now;
if i can marry.
i'll marry Demi Lovato in an instant.

back to the same problem of loneliness.

oh wonderful joy.

and they call you mother.

i guess this is my anthem for the time being.

i dont want to fall but sometimes i have to.
even if it hurts to do so.

anger in its purest form is you.
i just lost all my respect for you.
frustration in its purest form is also you.
you never listen do you?
and you're the purest form of disappointment.
becuase after 45 years, people would think you're the adult.
and you're wrong.
simple because you never listen.


tears will form.
but even if the anger is gone.
the hatred will still remain.




and i bet you forgot.

after all's said and done.
and after everything we've been through.
i miss you.
and it makes my heart ache.


you bloody liar.
you dont even have her number.

pain and loneliness ain't even the least of it.


you'll never understand.
what he's going through for you.
why not take a step back and see what you've become when the others are around.
pushover? i guess so.
cause you'll never think to put yourself in his shoes to see how hurt he is.

this aint right.
none of it is.
and to think that feelings were involved.

i've just been labelled geek by the king of geeks.
kwan chun sang.


haha.

saturday morning was amazing.

i think my whole outlook of him changed the moment i knew he was crying while watching "Marley and Me" but told me he yawned. thats why there were tears in his eyes.

that warmth.

to whom it may concern.

I JUST CHOPPED MY HAIR.
its shorter than sherry's one now.


enjoy your weekends! i know i'm going to enjoy mine.

dear kaira.


I DONT KNOW WHY YOUR TAGBOARD NOT WORKING YO! i cannot tag! and and and.
WHY ARE KIWI FRUITS SO EXPENSIVE? dont eat so much during winter okay? if not when you shit. shoot out kiwi seeds like machine gun bullets. HAHAHAHAH. i'm so funny sometimes.


and kaira?

I FUCKING MISS YOU!
and your hugs too ya?

i finally got around to possibly upload pictures to face book.
including CNY ones. I KNOW I'M SLOW LA.

okay. i'm gonna enjoy myself

i hate this job. i hate the people here even though there's not much of them. hate the fact that my boss is someone my mum knows. just hate it.

and im bearing with it cause of the money.

nessa-ology

here goes quiz number one. cause i simply refuse to do it in FB.

it's harder than you think!! Here is what you are supposed to do...and please don't spoil the fun...copy and paste into your own note, type in your answers and tag a bunch of people - including me. Answers to be based on 'at this current moment'

Where is your cell phone - on the bed.
Your hair - is messy is irritating me.
Your father - is happily dead.
Your favorite thing - my bed.
Your dream last night - didnt dream.
Your favorite drink - ice lemon tea.
Your dream/goal - to be demi lovato.
The room you are in - my room
Your fear - i dont know it yet?
Where do you want to be in 6 years – in a recording studio.
Muffins - chocolate chunk.
One of your wish list items - money.
Where you grew up - singapore
The last thing you did - eat kfc that was 5 days old.
What are you wearing - PJs.
Your TV - theres only one in the living room.
Your pets - died a long time ago.
Your computer - is burnin' up for you baby.
Your life - could be worse.
Your mood - bored.
Missing someone - not exactly.
Your car - mini cooper convertible.
Favorite store - the whole of orchard.
Your summer - never gone.
Your favorite color - purple. red. black.
When is the last time you laughed - yesterday i guess.
Last time you cried - 2 days ago.
last person who email me - time to check it.
my favorite food - i eat too much to have a favorite.
a place I would rather be right now - in a hug.
The person I think most likely will respond – none?


1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
- a character in a Hong Kong movie.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
- 2 days ago.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
- sometimes?

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
- beef?

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
- they are spawn of satan.

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
- depends?

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
- even nasri says so.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
- yes sir!

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
- if you pay me money to do.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
- fruit loops with choc milk.

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
- i dont tie them in th first place.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FAVOUR?
- choc mint.

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
- their smile?

15. RED OR PINK?
- pink is evil.

16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
- im comfortable with myself. thank you very much.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
- i cant really decide.

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?
- if they got no life like me la.

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
- multi coloured shorts thats meant for sleeping. and who wears shoes at home?

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
- michelle branch.

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
- purple!

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
- the smell of my bed.

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
- a customer.

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
- gymnastics.

27. HAIR COLOR?
- its brown and blone and ash and blue and pink and red and green. pick one.

28. EYE COLOR?
- black.

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
- when i'm out. yeah.

30. FAVORITE FOOD?
- so long as its food.

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
- happy endings.

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
- ben button with ben.

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
- black tank.

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
- summer.

35. HUGS OR KISSES?
- both?

37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
- none?

38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
- none?

39.WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
- re-reading my anita blakes.

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
- i think i destroyed mine.

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
- i didnt get to watch tv)):

42. FAVORITE SOUND(S)?
- the guitar.

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
- rolling stones baby.

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
- hong kong. haha.

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
- maybe.

46. WHERE WERE U BORN?
- singapore.

47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK?
- ...

48. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
- havent met him yet.



SUPPOSEDLY if you've seen over 85 movies, you have no life. Mark the ones you've seen. There are 239

movies on this list. Copy this list mail, go to your own facebook account, paste this as a note. Then, put x's

next to the movies you've seen, add them up, change the header adding your number, and click post at the

bottom. Have fun!

( ) Rocky Horror Picture Show
(x) Grease
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest
( ) Boondock Saints
() Fight Club
() Starsky and Hutch
( ) Neverending Story
( ) Blazing Saddles
( ) Airplane

Total: 3

( ) The Princess Bride
( ) AnchorMan
( ) Napoleon Dynamite
( ) Labyrinth
( ) Saw
( ) Saw II
( ) White Noise
( ) White Oleander
(x) Anger Management
(x) 50 First Dates
(x) The Princess Diaries
(x) The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement

Total so far: 7

( ) Scream
( ) Scream 2
( ) Scream 3
(x) Scary Movie
(x) Scary Movie 2
(x) Scary Movie 3
(x) Scary Movie 4
( ) American Pie
( ) American Pie 2
( ) American Wedding
(x) American Pie Band Camp

Total so far: 12

(x) Harry Potter 1
(x) Harry Potter 2
(x) Harry Potter 3
(x) Harry Potter 4
( ) Resident Evil 1
( ) Resident Evil 2
(x) The Wedding Singer
( ) Little Black Book
( ) The Village
(x) Lilo & Stitch

Total so far: 18

(x) Finding Nemo
( ) Finding Neverland
( ) Signs
(x) The Grinch
( ) Texas Chainsaw Massacre
( ) Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
(x) White Chicks
( ) Butterfly Effect
(x) 13 Going on 30
( ) I, Robot
( ) Robots

Total so far: 22

( ) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
( ) Universal Soldier
( ) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
( ) Along Came Polly
( ) Deep Impact
( ) KingPin
(x) Never Been Kissed
(x) Meet The Parents
( ) Meet the Fockers
( ) Eight Crazy Nights
( ) Joe Dirt
(x) KING KONG

Total so far: 25

(x) A Cinderella Story
( ) The Terminal
(x) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
( ) Passport to Paris
(x) Dumb & Dumber
(x) Dumber & Dumberer
( ) Final Destination
( ) Final Destination 2
( ) Final Destination 3
( ) Halloween
( ) The Ring
( ) The Ring 2
( ) Surviving X-MAS
(x) Flubber

Total so far: 30

(x) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
(x) Practical Magic
(x) Chicago
(x) Ghost Ship
( ) From Hell
(x) Hellboy
( ) Secret Window
( ) I Am Sam
(x) The Whole Nine Yards
( ) The Whole Ten Yards

Total so far: 36

( ) The Day After Tomorrow
( ) Child's Play
( ) Seed of Chucky
( ) Bride of Chucky
(x) Ten Things I Hate About You
( ) Just Married
( ) Gothika
( ) Nightmare on Elm Street
( ) Sixteen Candles
( ) Remember the Titans
( ) Coach Carter
( ) The Grudge
( ) The Grudge 2
(x) The Mask
( ) Son Of The Mask

Total so far: 38

( ) Bad Boys
( ) Bad Boys 2
( ) Joy Ride
( ) Lucky Number Seven
(x) Ocean's Eleven
(x) Ocean's Twelve
( ) Bourne Identity
( ) Bourne Supremecy
( ) Lone Star
(x) Bedazzled
( ) Predator I
( ) Predator II
( ) The Fog
(x) Ice Age
(x) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
( ) Curious George

Total so far: 43

(x) Independence Day
( ) Cujo
( ) A Bronx Tale
( ) Darkness Falls
( ) Christine
( ) ET
( ) Children of the Corn
( ) My Bosses Daughter
(x) Maid in Manhattan
( ) War of the Worlds
(x) Rush Hour
(x) Rush Hour 2

Total so far: 47

( ) Best Bet
(x) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
( ) She's All That
( ) Calendar Girls
( ) Sideways
(x) Mars Attacks
( ) Event Horizon
( ) Ever After
( ) Wizard of Oz
(x) Forrest Gump
( ) Big Trouble in Little China
(x) The Terminator
(x) The Terminator 2
(x) The Terminator 3

Total so far: 53

(x) X-Men
(x) X-Men 2
(x) X-Men 3
(x) Spider-Man
(x) Spider-Man 2
(x) Sky High
( ) Jeepers Creepers
( ) Jeepers Creepers 2
(x) Catch Me If You Can
(x) The Little Mermaid
(x) Freaky Friday
( ) Reign of Fire
( ) The Skulls
(x) Cruel Intentions
( ) Cruel Intentions 2
(x) The Hot Chick
(x) Shrek
(x) Shrek 2

Total so far: 66

( ) Swimfan
( ) Miracle on 34th street
( ) Old School
(x) The Notebook
( ) K-Pax
( ) Krippendorf's Tribe
(x) A Walk to Remember
( ) Ice Castles
( ) Boogeyman
(x) The 40-year-old-virgin

Total so far: 69

(x) Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring
(x) Lord of the Rings The Two Towers
(x) Lord of the Rings Return Of the King
( ) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
( ) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
( ) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade

Total so far: 72

( ) Baseketball
( ) Hostel
( ) Waiting for Guffman
( ) House of 1000 Corpses
( ) Devils Rejects
( ) Elf
( ) Highlander
( ) Mothman Prophecies
( ) American History X
( ) Three

Total so Far: 72

( ) The Jacket
(x) Kung Fu Hustle
(x) Shaolin Soccer
( ) Night Watch
(x) Monsters Inc.
(x) Titanic
( ) Monty Python and the Holy Grail
( ) Shaun Of the Dead
( ) Willard

Total so far: 76

( ) High Tension
( ) Club Dread
( ) Hulk
( ) Dawn Of the Dead
( ) Hook
(x) Chronicle Of Narnia The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe
( ) 28 days later
( ) Orgazmo
( ) Phantasm
( ) Waterworld

Total so far: 77

( ) Kill Bill vol 1
( ) Kill Bill vol 2
(x) Mortal Kombat
( ) Wolf Creek
(x) Kingdom of Heaven
( ) the Hills Have Eyes
( ) I Spit on Your Grave aka the Day of the Woman
( ) The Last House on the Left
( ) Re-Animator
( ) Army of Darkness

Total so far: 79

(x) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
(x) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones
( ) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
(x) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
(x) Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back
(x) Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedi
( ) Ewoks Caravan Of Courage
( ) Ewoks The Battle For Endor

Total so far: 84

(x) The Matrix
( ) The Matrix Reloaded
( ) The Matrix Revolutions
( ) Animatrix
( ) Evil Dead
( ) Evil Dead 2
( ) Team America: World Police
( ) Red Dragon
( ) Silence of the Lambs
( ) Hannibal

Total: 85 i think i still got a little life. haha.


Let others know a little more about yourself, re-post this as your name followed by "ology"

IF I TAGGED YOU, PLEASE PUT THIS UP ON YOUR PAGE AS A NOTE AND TAG SOME OTHER PEOPLE!


***********FOOD-OLOGY*****

**********

what is your choice of salad dressing?
:: italian or vingarette. how ever you spell it.

What is your favorite sit-down restaurant?
:: tcc always does it for me.

What food could you eat for 2 weeks straight and not get sick of it?
:: SUBWAY! EAT FRESH!

What are your pizza toppings of choice?
:: mushrooms. mushrooms. cheese. cheese. cheese. cheese. and mushrooms.

What do you like to put on your toast?
:: peanut butter and jam. nutella is good too but only with wheat bread.

**********TECHNOLOGY***************

How many television sets are in your house?
:: only one.

what color of cell phone do you have?
:: black and red and sexy.

***************BIOLOGY******************

Are you right-handed or left-handed?
:: i write with my right. steam milk with my left.

Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
:: i think no. my intestines are still where they're supposed to be.

What is the last heavy item you lifted?
:: 36 cartons of milk.

Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
:: nope.

************BULLCRAPOLOGY**************

If it is possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
:: nope. just drop dead and die will be nice.

If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
:: dahlia.

Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000?
:: nope. i'll have a stomach ulcer after tt.

************DUMBOLOGY******************

How many pairs of flip flops do you own?
:: two and a half pairs.

When is the last time you had a run-in with the cops?
:: years ago.

Last person you talked to?
:: mummy.

Last person you hugged?
:: KAYLEEN.

**************FAVORITOLOGY****************

Season?
:: autumn.

Holiday?
:: hong kong was good.

Day of the week?
:: saturdays. permernant weekends.

Month?
:: febuary. shortest month of the year.

***********CURRENTOLOGY*****************

Missing someone?
:: yeah.

Mood?
:: bored.

What are you listening to?
:: oasis.

Watching?
:: csi:ny.

Worrying about?
:: a birthday present.

***************RANDOMOLOGY*****************

First place you went this morning?
:: to pee.

What's the last movie you saw?
:: ben button.

Do you smile often?
:: i try.

***************QUESTIONS***************

1) Do you always answer your phone?
:: i answer them only when i know who's calling.

2) It's four in the morning and you get a text message, who is it?
:: jane. cause i'll fall asleep texting her.

3) If you could change your eye color what would it be?
:: purple. haha.

4) What flavor do you add to your drink with tonic?
:: tonic shouldnt be drunk at all.

5) Do you own a digital camera?
:: yes i do. and i need to charge it.

6) Have you ever had a pet fish?
:: a fighting fish. but i killed it.

7) Favorite Christmas song?
:: eh. none?

8) What's on your wish list for your birthday?
:: this year's birthday is still so fr away.

9) Can you do push ups?
:: hell no.

10) Can you do a chin up?
:: nope.

11) Does the future make you more nervous or excited?
:: like. i dont feel anything.

12) Do you have any saved texts?
:: yeah.

13) Ever been in a car wreck?
:: nope. claire is as safe as can be.

14) Do you have an accent?
:: when i get carried away i do.

15) What is the last song that made you cry?
:: taylor swift, i'd lie.

16) Plans tonight?
:: none.

17) Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom?
:: yeah.

18) Name 3 things you bought in the last week
:: havent been going shopping.

19) Have you ever been given roses?
:: yeah. but not from the person i wanted.

20) Current worry?
:: present. present. present.

21) Current hate right now?
:: work.

22) Met someone who changed your life?
:: a very special person.

23) How did you bring in the New Year?
:: working?

24) What song represents you?
:: that would be at least three albums wirth of songs.

25) Name three people who might complete this?
:: i. dont. know.

26) What were you doing at 12 AM last night
:: SLEEPING.

27) What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up?
:: so not going to work.



top 5 lists.

top 5 girlfriends.
1. christe.
2. samantha.
3. haruna.
4. claire.
5. jessamine.

top 5 guy friends.
1. nasri.
2. shabin.
3. cs.
4. dave.
5. ben.

top 5 confidantes.
1. christie.
2. shabin.
3. escuadra. because they are one entity.
4. claire.
5. dave.

top 5 accomplishments.
1. falling in love.
2. having my heart broken.
3. discovering my real friends.
4. survived his death.
5. being who i am today.

top 5 happiest moments in your life.
1. seeing a rainbow.
2. when my daddy pushed me on a swing when i was young.
3. when my mother hugged me for the first time in 4 years.
4. everytime i see my friends.
5. everytime i get my paycheck.

top 5 holiday destinations.
1. italy.
2. prague.
3. new york.
4. paris.
5. BAHAMAS.

top 5 places to get married.
1. CHIJMES. everyone who's close to me knows i want to get married there.
2. the rest dont really matter to me.
3.
4.
5.

top 5 choices of wedding entourage.
1. samantha.
2. shabin.
3. escuadra.
4. christe.
5. my mother la.

top 5 dislikes.
1. VEGETABLES.
2. whiny things.
3. kids.
4. old people.
5. arrogance.



i think i was beyond bored.

8 more days.


this is giving me a headache.